Tuesday, April 10, 2012

Oh my, ewwww: what do you do when what seems to be isn't, and what isn't really is?

Brandon and I had our first experience a moment ago with the whole "we're poor and married," and live in an adorable little crap hole.

I was being a good wife and making dinner for Brandon when I opened my fridge only to find some gray lint and what looked like mouse poop. Naturally, I freaked out and screamed to Brandon that I found mouse poop and we probably have a mouse problem, and we're going to be infected for life, and then I got weak in the knees and wanted to barf. Upon further investigation, I realized that the mouse poop was in fact a chocolate chip, calmed down, realized I should not jump to conclusions so irrationally, and had a moment's rest, until... dot dot dot. Upon further investigation, I realized that while the "mouse poop" was actually a chocolate chip, the gray lint was in actuality a little dead baby MOUSE. Then, I jumped up and down, freaked out again, while Brandon did the manly thing and got rid of it. Interestingly enough, as he cleaned out the bottom of the fridge, a bunch of gray lint came out from underneath that was not mice, and there were no more chocolate chips, or "chocolate chips."

How is a girl supposed to live when what looks like poop is really chocolate and what looks like lint is really a disgusting rot trap of nastiness that will haunt me in nightmares, and probably give me the plague? There really is a great lesson to be learned here about not trusting first appearances. What is it? Don't judge a book by its cover. All I'm saying is check the lint rack on your dryer BEFORE touching it with your hands. It could be mice.

Ugh. The good news is Brandon is a hero and he's going to buy mouse traps and that he ASSURED me there aren't any mice in our cupboards, our bed or my purse. I don't believe him, but whatever. The double good news is I lost my appetite and probably won't be able to eat ever again, so I am about to lose those extra 15 lbs. I've been wanting to lose. Oh yeah.

P.S. I have a picture, but didn't post it, because I don't want a dead mouse on my blog.  I hope you understand.

1 comment:

KT said...

I'm going to need the picture.